i am alright, i think

This year, unfortunately, did not started right or it might be that last year did not ended right. Either way, I just simply, well, simply wasn't myself today. I am off track these days... of almost everything. I had sleepless nights. I ate less. I just don't feel like living at all..

Although I am always showing the strong and postive side of me, i just could not help to break down. because I am tired. I am damn tired. But I could not rest... Rest seems like very distant. It seems to extend beyond the horizon...always getting far away from me.

What could i possibly do now? I should not let myself be too affected. But how? Pretend? Pretend that everything is just fine? And then?

Have i wasted too much of my time for nothing?